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Opinion

Are we going to be knocked off our perch?

November 4, 2009
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Are we going to be knocked off our perch?

David Moyes is interviewed in this month’s Four-Four-Two magazine, and they have opted for the typical close-up head shot. The Scot’s pale face and rusty hair contrast well with the two blue flames, his determined eyes, the eyes of someone going places. Pursed lips and dozens of thin wrinkles – like cracked glass – cover his face. He’s always struck me as a Glaswegian Jimmy Cagney,  driven and angry… The article itself points out that Moyes splashes out just over 3million pounds net per year, an impossibly small amount for a club that through a combination of team spirit and Moyes’ leadership has dug it’s heels in at fifth...

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Top 60 Everton Players: #60 THOMAS GRAVESEN

November 3, 2009
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Top 60 Everton Players: #60 THOMAS GRAVESEN

#60. Thomas Gravesen (2000-05, 2007-08) 132 appearances, 11 goals From the beginning of his Everton career, Gravesen set out to get noticed, playing like he should have an exclamation mark grafted onto his surname. The excitable Dane even saw red in one of his first outings, a “friendly” against Blackburn Rovers in 2000, for some appalling tackling. Gravesen had two stints at Everton, but his first was his best. Often starved of a partner to exchange skilful midfield repartee with, he was forced to roam on his own – a goggle-eyed, shaven-headed hunter-gatherer. Why is he on this list? Gravesen polarises opinion like Marmite, Spam and country music, but...

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HEAD, KNEE, CALF, THIGH, FOOT, CALF…..

October 29, 2009
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HEAD, KNEE, CALF, THIGH, FOOT, CALF…..

Next up is Villa at home and we face them hobbled by a long list of injured players and recent form which at best could be described as indifferent. From back to front the (hopefully) shorter-term injured are Yobo, Baines, Osman, Pienaar, Bilyaletdinov and Saha, the latter having come off at half-time at Spurs with a calf injury. The return of any of the above on Saturday would be welcome. Another question hovers in the ether; will Moyes stick with the rather sterile 4-5-1 formation he used in the disappointing draws against Stoke and Wolves or, as many would argue he should, opt for a more attacking 4-4-2. It may...

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THURSDAY FIVE – SUNDAY THREE – TUESDAY TWO…………

October 28, 2009
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A string of three tough away fixtures in six days during which we have conceded ten goals and shorn by injuries of ALL our creative players – Pienaar, Bilyaletdinov, Arteta, Osman (yes, we characterise him as ‘creative’); three top notch defenders – Baines, Yobo, Jageilka and our midfield ball-winner Neville we at least put up a fight at White Hart Lane last night. Moyes is, quite rightly, so incensed by this fixture pile up that he couldn’t trust himself in front of the press last night….and the journey home will have been quiet. A tough test awaits at Goodison on Saturday in the shape of Martin O’Neills’ Villa. Youngster...

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Four Reasons Goodison Will Never Leave Everton's Heart

October 5, 2009
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Four Reasons Goodison Will Never Leave Everton's Heart

This was published on the Times Online’s Fanzine Fanzone Last Week… The Four Sides To Goodison Park At the mere mention Goodison Park, my mind spins like a roulette wheel. Goodison has created a mountain of moments and her wingspan touches three separate centuries. Monarchs have strolled through Goodison’s stands, and its fans have crowned blue legends on Goodison’s green turf. The architect Archibald Leitch gave Goodison its shape, and hundreds of players painted memories onto the blank canvas.

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Everton – The Ship Isn't Sinking

August 18, 2009
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Our end game of last season was the Cup Final, a match which Chelsea deservedly won. It was OK though, our run to the final had been heroic, and as I watched our glum chain gang lope up the stairs to claim their runners up medals, most were consoled by the fact that next season our spine would be back. I suppose I was deluding myself, because our spine – Jagielka, Arteta, Yakubu – won’t be back for a while yet. Not to worry though, we’ve signed some new players haven’t we? Well no, not really… with only days to go until the transfer window slams down on us...

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Oi, Hughes! No Means No!

August 14, 2009
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David Moyes, the man who had the temerity to say no to Mark Hughes, let rip today – and I love him even more for it. According to every news source with a pulse, Moyes has torn “Sparky” a new one for not understanding the word “no”… The Independent’s Paul Walker writes: Moyes, preparing his side for tomorrow’s season opener at home to Arsenal, launched a bitter attack on Hughes and City. He said: “There is no dialogue between us and Manchester City as far as I know. “Maybe City are having dialogue with somebody else, but it is not between me and City. “He (Hughes) said they were...

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Mark Hughes: Blithering Idiot

August 13, 2009
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Mark Hughes’ antics remind me of a scene from Dumb and Dumber: Lloyd: What do you think the chances are of a guy like you and a girl like me… ending up together?Mary: Well, Lloyd, that’s difficult to say. I mean, we don’t really…Lloyd: Hit me with it! Just give it to me straight! I came a long way just to see you, Mary. The least you can do is level with me. What are my chances?Mary: Not good.Lloyd: You mean, not good like one out of a hundred?Mary: I’d say more like one out of a million.Lloyd: So you’re telling me there’s a chance… Meanwhile, Football 365′s Mediawatch...

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The Joleon Question – Three sides to the story

August 13, 2009
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This was originally published on the Times Fanzine Fanzone Page. And it continues…Lescott wants to leave, Moyes doesn’t want to sell, and Hughes is still returning with bids for the player. The harder Moyes rejects the bids the more the Welshman boomerangs back. Hughes’ bids amount to Chinese Water Torture; an incessant drip – intriguing Lescott and annoying Moyes in equal measure. All this is surrounded by hordes of blithering idiots, who munch unquestioningly over the daily tabloids. It’s impossible to know what is happening at the centre of the storm, but here are three views… I. Mark Hughes is a pillock. A dangerous pillock who won’t take no...

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Holiday Blues in Detroit

August 12, 2009
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“Dee-troit has some great teeth… she’s just got a lot missing too.” The driver tossed this witty nugget into the backseat of the taxi, he was a small man whose mood could be entirely gauged by his grip on the steering wheel. They say that if you want a good tour of a city, take a taxi. And I had never been to the centre of Motown so I thought I’d give it a go. This is a city with a rich history but a non-existent bank balance — a city whose (now ex) Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick was someone definitely in the Peter Johnson mould, screwing Detroit out of...

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New Premier League season kicks-off the weekend of 18/19 August. Next seasons fixtures will be announced mid-June

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