It’s funny how the football pendulum swings. We went from Moyes (“too honest”), to Martinez (“not honest enough”), and now to Koeman (“too honest”).
All overseen by Chairman Bill Kenwright, oft criticised for his jackanory style of leadership.
And now majority shareholder Farhad Moshiri. He delivers his honesty via a direct line to Sky & Talk Sports’ Jim White, scurrying down a footballing Mount Sinai with Moshiri’s missives written on the iPhone notes app.
The question is, do we like it direct or not?
My answer: Sort of.
Our latest manager “tells it like it is”*. The consensus is that this is refreshing when he uses his truthiness to assess our under-performing players, uncomfortable when he talks about Lukaku’s future, and downright outrageous when he talks up Liverpool’s chances of winning the title. Note to Ronald, the truth is only acceptable when it doesn’t hurt.
Equally, we like our bullsh*t believable. Martinez overstepped the mark with his gushing about Ross Barkley (“I’d rather have him than Messi”), and liberally sprinkled the word “phenomenal” over mediocre performances like bullsh*t confetti.
Since leaving Everton things have clearly gone south for our Catalan post-truther. He now sounds like a cross between Sarah Palin going rogue without an auto-cue and a faulty WestWorld Host:
Listen to the utter drivel coming out of Roberto Martinez’ mouth… pic.twitter.com/PhFXzKj8Fv
— Ed (@dixiessixty) July 10, 2016
We want the truth? We can’t handle the truth!
We need our truth only when it doesn’t hurt, and like our lies to be at least slightly believable. As the Echo’s Dave Prentice points out, Ronald Koeman should take more care with his truth bombs. Poor Davey Moyes is still getting attacked for his “knife to a gunfight” truth burp. Clearly the Dutchman needs to use more common sense, but more than anything he needs to win.
The bald truth? You can say what you want as long as you bring us three points on the weekends…
Premier League: Saturday 11 March (15:00); West Bromwich Albion at Goodison
Saturday 18 March (15:00); Hull City at Goodison